Feeling Burnt Out?

The Singer's Burnout Cycle and How to Heal

Burnout is a serious condition that affects millions of people worldwide, especially in the arts, when it feels like the work we are putting in will never reap rewards. When we put our souls on the line and aren’t seen, valued, or appreciated for our efforts. It affects our physical and emotional well-being and can put us in a state of mental exhaustion. This combination often leads to a sense of detachment from our love of creating music and can even lead to serious physical and mental health issues. It’s essential to watch out for the warning signs because burnout is not permanent.

In a singer’s life (and really any musician, for that matter), there are constant, mini burnout cycles that persist, and without appropriate attention and care, they WILL lead to burnout. 

THE CYCLE:

1. Pressure - It invades us from all sides. It stems from auditions and competitions, scholarship requirements, teachers, peers, parents, administrators, and our own expectations of ourselves and perfectionism. Our internal pressure often carries the biggest weight of them all. 

2. Comparison & Jealousy - It’s hard to ignore when our friends and colleagues are getting gigs and auditions, while we aren’t. With social media, people only post their wins. You might think, “What do they have that I don’t?” or  “I’ll never be as good as them”, or “It’s not worth it anyway. There isn’t enough room for everybody in this career.” You start to feel jealous of somebody you barely know or a close friend you’ve grown distant from. No matter how much success you attain, the jealousy isn’t tamed. Somebody is always doing better than you in some way. This causes isolation, loneliness, and resentment. Many people will experience the inability to lean on their peers because everybody competes with each other, constantly comparing themselves to the person next to them, rather than focusing on their own individual paths and successes. 

3. Exhaustion- We eat, sleep, and breathe music. If we aren’t playing/singing, we are studying or listening. It’s around us 24/7.  Without intentional breaks and listening to our bodies when we need rest, we can become consumed. We treat ourselves with scrutiny under our most critical eye because if we fall short, we will fall behind. My favorite question to ask my colleague is what hobbies they have and what they like to do outside of music. Most people get stumped; I did too for a while. 

4. Always Saying “Yes” - We are taught that every opportunity is a good one, and if we receive an offer or a chance to learn something new, we have to take it. You’re conditioned that the spot in the pay-to-sing is your big break. Spoiler Alert: You’re allowed to say “no”. In fact, you must say “no”. And it won’t ruin your chances of having the career you want. You can deny opportunities. Saying “yes” just piles on tasks and opportunities, which feeds the rest of this cycle and prevents you from doing your best work because you are stretched so thin. Additionally, the opportunity just might not be what fits your current needs. Of course, keep saying “yes”, but permit yourself to also say “no”. Saying “no” means knowing your worth. 

There is no starting or ending point for this cycle because it is different for every individual, but it continues unless recognized and interrupted. One thing feeds the next, and it just continues. We are often told to keep going because it will get better, but I can’t accept that as the way that we are meant to deal with this cycle and with burnout. 

How Do We Heal From Burnout??

Burnout is not just tiredness. It’s fatigue, brain fog, insomnia, apathy towards friends and colleagues, detachment from your true passion, anxiety, panic attacks, decreased productivity and procrastination, etc. It can also manifest physically in the form of headaches/migraines, stomach issues, muscle tension, constant colds and illnesses, susceptibility to infections, and more. 

Wow. That must have felt like reading the side effect list of a medication advertisement, but these are just a few of the many symptoms of burnout. It’s essential to recognize the root of your burnout. Is it pressure, jealousy, rest, inability to say no, or even all of the above?

So how do we start to turn these symptoms around and heal from the inside out? How do we fall in love with music again? Although this list is just the start, I hope it helps some of you, as it did for me when I struggled with burnout for the first time. 

1. Prioritize Self-Care - Are you fed, walked, and watered? All this means is prioritize yourself. Make sure you are getting enough sleep, eating well, and moving your body. Don’t skip showers. Often, we leave ourselves on the sidelines and forget that we are living and breathing bodies that need to sleep and eat to survive. This can look like a self-care night with a bubble bath, wine, and face masks, or video games and a home-cooked meal. Anything that you need to give yourself the attention that you deserve. Take yourself out on a date. 

2. Seek Out Support - talk to friends, family, or even a professional about how you are feeling and what you are experiencing. We often feel alone as we experience burnout so it helps to know that other people have gone through similar things and made it to the other side. Seeking professional help is my biggest recommendation because therapists can provide specific tools that can help you work through your burnout. 

3. Take a Break - Take time off from school or between gigs if necessary. Of course, this is not always possible because of finances and people relying on you, but try to schedule breaks between gigs as much as possible, so you don’t just go from one to the other. Breaks are necessary to recharge and regain perspective. If you can’t take a full day off, take short breaks throughout the day when you can focus on something other than music. 

4. Have a Life Outside of Music - Make friends who aren’t musicians. Go for a run. Join a sewing club. Try woodworking. Find people who follow different career paths or have different interests than you. They will offer a fresh perspective on life, help you become a well-rounded individual, and inspire you to find happiness in something outside of music. Making your career your only source of joy and success adds a lot of pressure to your plate if it ends up being different from what you initially imagined. One of my favorite ways to unwind is by visiting the pottery studio to create something out of clay. 

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5. Reflect on Your Values & Goals - it is easy to get carried away in your career to the point that you’ve lost all sense of where you’ve been and where you wanted to go. Take a moment to align with your current needs and goals. You don’t have to hold onto what you used to want or what somebody else told you to want.  

6. Set Realistic Boundaries - I already mentioned this. Please learn to say “no”. Learn to say “no” to opportunities that do not feed your personal goals and ideas of success. Give yourself the permission and the power to say no. Your worth is not dependent on one person giving you one chance to sing for one group of people. 

Remember, burnout is a serious condition that should not be ignored. In my experience with it, I lost all love for music and singing. It became a chore, and I could no longer rely on the thing that had been there for me for my entire life. I mourned my connection to it. I realized I was tired of feeling like there was no meaning to my life and started to recognize the burnout cycle and followed the steps I listed above. I came back to myself and started to love making music again. All because I was making music for myself, because I wanted to, and not because somebody else told me I had to do it in a certain way. It was a long journey, and it continues to be because it is easy to fall back into the cycle, even if you have overcome it. 

If you are experiencing any of these warning signs, take action as soon as possible. By taking care of yourself and seeking out support, you can prevent burnout and regain a sense of balance and fulfillment in your life.

Especially in the face of burnout, just remember, Happy Singing!